“Diotrephes and Demetrius”

In verses 1-8 John commends the righteous behavior of Gaius. Gaius is the example of what it means to show Christian love. John now introduces us to a person who is the exact opposite of Gaius. His name is Diotrephes. Most likely Diotrephes was the pastor of an area church. His name means “nourished by Jove”. Jove was the king of gods in Roman mythology. Diotrephes was a very uncommon name. At the very least it suggests that he was raised by devoted pagan parents. That’s not a surprising thing, however. In the first century virtually everyone in the church had been raised with a pagan background. Diotrephes was probably a convert to Christianity who possessed great leadership skills, had a good understanding of the Christian faith, and expressed Christ like character. Therefore he had been chosen to be a pastor of one of the churches. It’s interesting that John never says anything about Diotrphes doctrine. He never rebukes him for being a Gnostic or not believing in the Deity of Christ. We can be sure that if Diotrephes was teaching false doctrine John would have called him on it. He had no problem doing that in his first two epistles. So what was Diotrephes problem? Let’s look at what John says.

Diotrephes loved to be first. Look at verse 9. John had written a letter to the church Diotrephes led. The letter was to be read to the congregation. John says that Diortephes would not receive that letter. What does that mean?

*It could mean that he took the letter and disposed of it never even mentioning it to the congregation.

* It could mean that he told the congregation he received it but refused to read it to them.

* It could mean he read the letter to the congregation and then ridiculed it demeaning John.

John does tell us why Diotrephes would not receive him. It was because Diotrephes loves to have the preeminence. That little phrase means that Diotrephes loves to be first. His problem was pride.

We don’t know exactly what the letter contained. But I don’t think that it would be a stretch to say that it contained the same type of request John had just given to Gaius. John had encouraged Gaius to work together with the traveling missionaries (5-8). Maybe Diotrephes was focused so much on his own ministry that he didn’t think the church needed to be helping out other ministries. That’s not an uncommon thing in the church. Pride can cause a leader to focus on building a ministry for all the wrong ministries. We mistakenly think that the bigger “our” ministry is the blessed we are. Therefore, when resources or time is given to a ministry we are not leading we become jealous. I believe that’s what happened with Diotrephes. He wanted to be on top. He wanted to have the best church. He had his own ideas and goals and he didn’t want anyone, not even the apostle John to come around and hinder him from reaching those goals.

Diotrephes was a gossip. In verse 10 John says that he was “prating against us with malicious words”. The phrase describes a person that speaks evil words about a person. In order to build themselves up some people tear others down. In the ministry sometimes leaders seek to destroy other people’s ministries by their words. Their hope is to gain that person’s followers or to keep their followers from following the other person. Diotrephes was gossiping about John and other spiritual leaders. It’s not told exactly what he was saying. But his intent was to exalt himself and minimize the necessity of the other preachers.

John had learned from experience that demeaning the ministries of others was not something the Lord looked upon with favor. Mark 9:38-40 says “And John answered him saying Master we saw one casting out devils in Thy name and he followeth not us: and we forbade him, because he followeth not us. But Jesus said “Forbid him not…For he that is not against us is on our part.” Paul knew about that as well. In Philippians 1:16 Paul tells us that some were preaching against him from their pulpits. Paul was in prison and local pastors were putting him down. Yet Paul said in Philippians 1:18 “Christ is preached; and I herein do rejoice.”

There are ministers that are to be called out because of their false doctrine. However, when a person is preaching and living the gospel we should rejoice that their ministries are growing. We should be excited about that. We have to guard against pride. Pride will lead us to gossip about those doing a work for God. As ministers we are working together to build the church, not our church. A growing church is not a threat to a neighboring pastor. It is a mark of God’s Spirit moving in a community.

Diotrephes was a divider. In verse 10 John says that Diotrephes was not content with merely gossiping. He went a step further. He would not receive the traveling missionaries and was excommunicating church members that did! The pastor had given instructions to the congregation not to help the missionaries. Those that did were kicked out of the church. He had drawn a line in the sand. He was saying “You are with them or with me”. Diotrephes had gone too far. In fact he was hindering the Word of God. These men had been sent out to preach the good news. They had departed by faith trusting that God would use His people to take care of them. Now Diotrephes was forbidding the people of God from helping with the work of God. He had become a stumbling block.

One can only imagine the confusion in the church. New believers would not have known what to do. It was clear that a division had developed within the church. Some were being removed from fellowship. They didn’t agree with Diotrephes. The Lord led them to help the missionaries and they did. But I’m sure the young Christians were confused. Should they follow their pastor or should they follow the wise church members? Diotrephes is a perfect example of a person that has truth without love (2 John 3).

Diotrephes would be confronted. Look at the beginning of verse 10. John says “If I come I will remember his deeds”. In other words, if the aging John was able to make it, he would take care of this guy by himself. We can be sure that John would use the Matthew 18 model. He would confront Diotrephes to his face. If that didn’t work he would take it to the church leaders. If that didn’t’ work he would bring it before the congregation. The point had come where something had to be done. John was not afraid to take care of this situation. The work of Christ was being hindered. Something had to be done.

It is important that we not allow leaders to become self serving tyrants. That’s not the type of leadership Christ has called us to. Jesus tells us in John 13:13-14 “Ye call Me Master and Lord: and ye say well; for so I am. If I then your Lord and Master have washed your feet; ye also ought to wash one another’s feet”. Christ has called us to servant leadership. That’s the type of leadership we should expect in our churches.

In verse 11-12 John introduces us to a new man. His name is Demetrius. He is the polar opposite of Diotrephes. In verse 11 John tells Gaius not to imitate Diotrephes. His actions are evil. Diotrephes, as much as he may think he is, is not a good role model for pastors. The problem with Diotrphes was that he had truth but he didn’t have love. He passed the doctrinal test but he failed the moral test. That’s why John says “he that doeth evil hat not seen God”. Many unsaved men find themselves in the pastorate. Some reveal their lack of salvation by falling into false doctrine. Others reveal it by an ungodly lifestyle. But eventually all reveal it.

What should we do when we find out that a leader of a church is likely unsaved or at least unqualified to be a pastor? Well, we should not follow him! That’s what John says. We should not submit ourselves to his teaching. To do so would mean putting ourselves in harm’s way.

Look at verse 12. John says Demetrius has a good report of all men. Demetrius probably came from the same type of background as Diotrephes. His name means “belonging to Demeter”. Demeter was the Greek goddess of grain and the harvest. It was a common name. Demetrius was likely raised by pagan parents. But there came a point when he gave his life to Jesus. His testimony was far great than Diotrephes. Notice what John says about him.

Demetrius has a good testimony of all men. That means a lot of Christians knew him and they all said the same thing about him. John wasn’t the only one that believed he was a godly man.

Demetrius lived the truth. He believed the gospel and lived his life according to the gospel. His life was measured by the word of God and found to be in line with it.

Demetrius was commended by spiritually mature men. John says “and we bear record and you know that our record is true”. John and other leaders in the church had great things to say about Demetrius.

These are three good tests of a man of God. What does the church think of him? What does the Bible say about him? What do spiritually mature men think of him?

v.13-14 It seems John never says all he wants to say (John 21:25, 2 John 1:12). John was planning a trip shortly. He would see Gaius face to face. Gaius church was probably close to Diotrephes church. John wanted to make a trip to the area to confront him. John would come to encourage some pastors and rebuke others. He gives Gaius a blessing of peace and send greetings from Christian friends. John also asks Gaius to tell some of their mutual friend’s “hello” for him. Obviously some were more close to John than others. Gaius and John’s relationship was so close that Gaius knew who he was talking about.

3 John reminds us that ministry is not about us. God did not save us so that we could build a monument to ourselves. He has saved us to bring glory to Christ. John the Baptist said of Jesus “He must increase but I must decrease”. When john saw Jesus he pointed his own disciples away from himself and to the Lord (John 1:35-37). That’s the type of leader we should seek to be. That’s the type of leaders we should follow.